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being broke and being an arse all at once

I watched Tyler Perry’s Diary of a Mad Black Woman recently. I noticed how as with many romantic movies with poor boy winning pretty girl over rich boy, rich boy is an arse and poor boy is a poet.

Being broke and being an arse at once
By: Desmond Ntshalintshali

I watched Tyler Perry’s Diary of a Mad Black Woman recently. I noticed how as with many romantic movies with poor boy winning pretty girl over rich boy, rich boy is an arse and poor boy is a poet. A nice guy basically, overly-romantic. You know what I mean.
This has been the case with many other movies of similar storyline that I have seen. But how much of this fiction does translate to reality? Does more money buy me some weight in the arrogant, rude, abusive, promiscuous, VIP section? Does not having BEE money in my account mean that I have to have great personality? Does it mean that I have to compensate for my monetary impotence with my behavior and treatment of others, women in particular?
Well, personality, no matter how amazing, can’t buy you Jimmy Choo or Louis Vitton (Real or fake. They are just too expensive for personality). But it can make you smile. It can’t guarantee you an entrance at Zar or the Durban July. But it can make you feel especial and beautiful even when you haven’t even had a bath. .
Opinions of younger women differ, as they should, from those of older women when it comes to this issue. However, it’s a bonus if a younger woman thinks like an older woman. The other way round, is a disaster in thick make up and mini skirt trying to take center stage long after its prime.
Older women are more on personality and treatment. They have fallen for the fairy tale in the past. If they were pretty, they did date or marry the rich guy and he cheated on them with even younger and prettier girls and felt not an ounce of guilt. He might have even been directly abusive in one way or another. He knew she wouldn’t go anywhere and leave all that money behind.
Younger women wouldn’t admit that they want money. They try to sound smart and deep you see. You know what their new catch phrase is? ‘a bit of both wouldn’t hurt.’ Oh please! I have a bit of both. Well, I think. But women my age don’t chase after me! For some strange reason, some like the way I look. But really, that’s just about it. Not a bit of both!
Ok. Here’s my point. Here’s a very, very, very nice guy: faithful, loving, easy on the eye, romantic, everything. But he doesn’t have a job. He’s been looking for it. But poor Jack just can’t find it. How many good-looking girls do you know would stay for longer than if Jack was this guy: Millionaire, sleeps around, pretentious, arrogant and buys her real Jimmy Choo and real Louis Vitton?
For the first guy, they are quick to leave. They say he’s not ambitious. He doesn’t have dreams. His efforts to look for something like a job don’t count. Sorry Jack. At least if he’s studying to be a lawyer or a C.A.
For the second guy, sometimes he has to kick them out. Just like in Perry’s movie. And guess what, in the movie, she came back! She found a nice guy, who works in some mechanic shop. Good looking guy who drives a pick-up truck. She left him and went back to where the money was. She found that he was still a mean arse but this time, he was also broke. So, smart thing to do, she ran back to love. And of course, it’s just a movie… love was still there waiting.
Here’s the sad thing though, there are women who, after being with the rich idiot, have decided to lower their standards a bit and date a normal person. A person with a job. A person who actually has to work for their money. Like a writer. No, that’s not a job. A call centre supervisor. A junior marketing manager. The guy who has time for facebook. Only to get played and cheated on. Now that… that is some serious bs. It’s an injustice actually.
Personally, I want money. I chase money. I might not have as much as I want. I believe however that the discipline and hard work it takes to chase anything is in itself a noble course than being content with lack just because I’m lazy.
I don’t even think I would have a woman who expects less from me. Hell, I don’t even want one. One who just wants my personality? I’d rather have a woman who wants a man who tries, harder.
One day when I have a son, I will teach him to love himself and to love God. I will teach him to know where his value lies so that he won’t need to use money to buy importance and approval from women and respect from other men.
And say I’m extreme, but I’d rather have that son of mine be arrogant than have a low self-esteem. It would be easier to bring him back to humility than up to confidence. He can be a character that I have not seen in most movies – the rich boy who is smart and a nice guy and wins the pretty girl. And I intend to lead by example. If only I can get a job…